New Year’s Resolutions Done Right: 7 Tips for Balancing Self Improvement with Emotional Wellness

The air is crisp, your friends are donning their holiday best, and you’re wondering how the time has gone by so quickly. Yes, it’s December, alright! December is a month like no other, whether you’re figuring out how to decorate in time, coping with grief, or just trying to find a way to politely decline the endless donation requests outside your local grocery store. And of course, lurking beyond the bags of crumpled wrapping paper looms a fresh start – the new year. 

The new year brings both opportunity and expectation to create a “new you,” but is that really necessary? New year’s resolutions are notoriously abandoned by February, leaving you with nothing but a sense of failure and guilt. Is there a way to prioritize emotional wellness while still taking advantage of the clean slate ahead? 

The answer is YES, and here’s how! 

1.        Start with a meaningful reflection. Let’s begin by taking stock of the previous year. Did you have goals that you accomplished? Did something unexpected go well? What matters most to you in the coming year? Start by journaling, talking it out with a friend, or mulling it over on a walk. Ask yourself what strengths you can build upon this year, and what deficits you’re motivated to improve. The process of reflection can help you identify goals that are truly aligned with your values and prioritize your wellness.

2.        Lead with compassion, not guilt. Starting the new year with a list of shoulds doesn’t just make you feel bad – it sets you up to abandon your new goal. Instead of bullying yourself into a new behavior, try focusing on why the goal matters to you. If you are renewing your commitment to housekeeping, remind yourself that you deserve a clean living space. If you want to take more pictures, remind yourself that you deserve to record your treasured memories. 

3.        Make your goals specific and measurable. Vague goals are grounds for forgotten resolutions. Imagine your resolution is to get more fresh air. This worthwhile endeavor would be very easy to procrastinate until it simply falls off of your ever-changing to-do list. Now, instead imagine your resolution is to spend five minutes outdoors, five days a week. This concrete version of the goal is much more likely to have you lacing up your sneakers and zipping up your coat. 

4.        Leave room for error. Did you notice that the example in Tip #3 seems pretty easy? That was by design. An insurmountable goal is not only harder to accomplish, but it’s harder to even get started! Let’s leave intimidating resolutions in 2025, please. Start with what you think is realistic, and then set a goal that’s even easier. Small wins help you build momentum, and before you know it you may even exceed what you set out to do.

5.        Create a plan for follow through. Before setting off to tackle a goal, make a plan. What barriers do you anticipate showing up? How can they be problem-solved in advance? If you’re forgetful, try setting alarms or leaving visual reminders. If discipline is a challenge, try developing a system of rewards – little treat, anyone? If the issue is accountability (relatable), try asking a loved one to check in on your progress now and then.

6.        Celebrate any progress! You’ve taken stock of your values and priorities, you’ve set compassionate, measurable, and realistic goals, you’ve even followed through. Don’t wait until next December to acknowledge your achievements! Setting mini-goals along the way will help keep you motivated and give you opportunities to recognize how far you’ve come.

7.        If you need more support, reach out. At A Step Forward Counseling and Psychotherapy, we have a team of professionals who specialize in helping clients with all of the above. If you run into challenges identifying values and goals, leading with compassion, problem-solving barriers, or acknowledging your strengths, please don’t hesitate to contact our team to connect with someone who can support you in the process. It’s our favorite thing to do.